The First 24 Hours With
Your New Rescue Dog! 1
By Martin McKenna
I’ve always
adopted rescue dogs
myself and think
they make fantastic
family members! It was
actually stray dogs
in Ireland who
taught me dog
language when I
was a boy. Since
then I’ve fostered
hundreds of rescue
dogs and helped
prepare many more
for re-homing.
Here’s some
simple ideas I
learned along the
way….
Before you go
and pick up
your new rescue
dog, let’s spend a
moment exploring how dogs think…
The secret game
all dogs play
against us:
All
dogs instinctively play a secret
game against humans
and other dogs
and animals. From the
moment they wake
up in the
morning, they’re trying to
work out who
the Boss is.
Throughout
the day, dogs toss
around lots of
challenges at everyone. If
they win the
challenge – they win a point.
Dogs
are ingenious at
winning points from
humans. They have about
25 really simple
challenges that they
practice until they’re
brilliant at winning
them. You can learn
more about these
in my free
info sheets, “The 25
secret ways dogs
become our Boss.”
I
really recommend you
read these sheets
and learn to
recognize when a dog’s trying
to score points
off you!
Here’s
a few other
ways dogs win
points from you. Do
any of these
look familiar?
Whoever has
the highest point
score gets to be the
Boss. Life is pretty
simple in the
Dog World.
Dogs always
know everybody’s score
around them. They know
exactly how many
points they’ve won. They
even watch other
dogs winning points
off their owners
and keep count. I’ll
never stop being
amazed at how
brilliant dogs are
at remembering all
the points in
the day they’ve
won!
“Naughty
rescue dogs” are
just dogs who
are throwing out
lots of challenges – and winning
far too many
points from their
human owners.
All
dogs obsessively play
this secret game. It
rules their life
and you’ll never
change it. All you
can do is
win as many
challenges as calmly
as you can.
Remember – if you
have a higher
point score than
your new rescue
dog, it’ll give in
and let you
be the Boss. It
will want to
please you.
However, the
moment you lose
lots of challenges – then look
out – your dog will
quickly start winning
points and misbehaving!
Luckily, once you know what you’re doing, it can be pretty easy to win more points than your rescue dog. Here’s some short cuts I’ve learned over the years. You may like to try them.
Can you recognize
a stressed, confused rescue
dog?
Warning! A
rescue dog jumping
all over you
and licking you in an
excited way is
not showing happy, affectionate behavior.
I
guess I should
break a few
myths here.
If a new
rescue dog is
nudging you for
pats, jumping excitedly all
over you, mouthing you
in a frenzy, barking at
you for attention, leaning all
over you or
licking you manically – then it’s not
showing you happy, affectionate behavior.
This
is all very
pushy, dominant behavior.
It’s the
way rescue dogs
score massive amounts
of points against
their new humans
as fast as
they can. Each time
they touch your
body in a
demanding way with
their tongue, body or
claws – they score a
point. An excited dog
can quickly win
150 to 200
points against a
human within 10
minutes!
Why do some
rescue dogs throw
a lot of
challenges at us?
Some rescue dogs toss a lot of
challenges at humans
because they’re so
stressed and don’t
trust a human to be
their leader.
Why
are they stressed? Rescue shelters
can be pretty
scary places for
dogs. No matter how
great a rescue
shelter is and
believe me – rescue volunteers
do everything in
their power to
make these places
as comfortable as
they can, there are
dogs in pens
who are continuously
calling out for
help.
Understandably, all those anxious noises
and smells make
your new dog
very worried too. An
anxious, stressed dog will
try and gain
control of you
by winning as
many points as
possible. A dog will
throw much less
challenges at you
if you can calm it
down.
The
more manic a
dog is behaving, the
more stressed it’s
feeling. It might be
barking a lot, pulling
itself so hard
on the leash that it
almost chokes itself, racing around
in all directions
or trying to
jump up on people as
it tries to
invade their personal
space.
This manic behavior
might be because
it’s bursting with
teenage hormones. Maybe it’s been caged
up for a
while without enough
exercise. Or it might
be getting excited
by your own enthusiastic energy. Perhaps it’s
learned to dominate
all the humans
who come near
it. No doubt it’s
also freaking out
being at a
shelter near lots
of other stressed
dogs.
What
signals can you
use to relax your
new rescue dog?
Here’s
some relaxing signals
I’ve learned from watching older, wiser
dogs who had
to settle new
dogs into the
pack…
1. Don’t stare at your dog all the time.
Staring
at a new dog is
very bad manners
in the Dog
World. You’ll confuse and
stress your dog
if you watch it too
much. Learn to occasionally
look at your
dog by letting
your eyes drift
over it in
a leisurely, bored fashion.
2. If you do make eye contact with your new dog, simply close your eyes sleepily and look away in a bored way.
This is Dog Language for, “Just
relax, you’re safe now.”
It’s very
confronting for your
new dog if you have
your body directed
at it all
the time. Learn to turn your
body and feet slightly in
another direction from
your dog. Even turn
your back on
your dog every
now and again. This
allows your dog
to switch off
from you and
not feel like
it’s under the
powerful spotlight of
your gaze all
the time. No dog
likes being studied
non-stop. I know you’re
just fascinated by
your new dog – but
your dog doesn’t
understand that!
5. Give lots
of sleepy yawns.
Your yawns
say in Dog
Language, “We’re all
safe so relax. There’s nothing
to worry about.”
6. Learn to really slow your energy down to sleepy, relaxed levels.
This also
says
in dog language, “I’m relaxed
so you should
relax too. Nothing’s happening
that you have
to worry about.”
So
stop rushing around, start
breathing slowly and
deeply.
Why does my
dog shake itself?
Sometimes
you’ll see your
new dog shaking
its head or
body all over
as though it’s
shaking off invisible
water. What it’s doing
is shaking all
the stress and
confusion from its
body.
Even the
tiniest amounts of
stress get shaken
off! This is a
good thing and
you should just
ignore it or turn your
head away and yawn sleepily. The
longer a dog
shakes, the more stressed
it was.
Sometimes
after you pat
your dog, it will
shake off all
the stress and
excess energy you
passed on to it.
Just keep
an eye out
for how many
times a dog
shakes itself a
day…it’s amazing how
often a dog feels
the need to
keep balancing its
energy by getting
rid of the
bad stuff. I have
a feeling we
humans could learn
something from our
dogs here!
Are you giving
your new rescue
dog far too
much attention and
affection?
Most
new owners make
the mistake of
flooding their new
rescue dog with
far too much attention.
They can’t drag
their eyes away
from their new
dog, they keep touching
it and patting
it and they
talk non-stop to it.
However
dogs see humans
who behave in
this way as
very weak. It’s like the demanding, annoying behavior
of a young
pup or teenage
dog hassling an
older dog.
No
rescue dog will
allow a person
hassling them in
this way with
too much affection
to ever be
their Boss. If you
act like this, then
I have to
be honest – your new
rescue dog will
become increasingly worried. Your
new dog wants
you to be
in charge – not acting
like a silly
puppy who’s trying
to dominate it
with too much
attention!
A worried
rescue dog will ignore you as a way of
trying to switch
off your
confusing behavior. Or it
will throw lots
of challenges at
you to make
damned sure you
don’t become their
Boss.
Either
way, you’re not helping your new
dog relax if
you keep flooding
it with too
much affection and
attention. As tempting as
it is to
baby a new
dog – do try to
act like a
sensible, wise leader.
What about if
I just want
to be my
dog’s best friend
and not its
Boss?
Dogs
have a brain
that’s designed differently
to a human
brain. In the Dog
World you can
never be someone’s
equal because their mind can’t understand
this sophisticated human
concept.
Dog’s
always need to
know who’s the
leader and who’s
the follower. It’s a
survival mechanism Mother
Nature put in
most animals as
a clever way
of stopping them
from fighting non-stop.
You
can be your
dog’s best friend
but you also
have to be
your dog’s leader
too. Don’t worry – dogs
adore great human
leaders! They find
them reassuring and very,
very fascinating. Your dog
will like you so much
more if you
make the effort
to be a
great leader as
well as a
best friend. A happy
dog is a
dog with a
great human leader.
New rescue dogs
desperately ask their
new humans to
stop giving them
so much attention…but
are you listening?
Dogs
try to communicate
with us all
the time, but unfortunately
not many humans
understand the International
Language of Dogs
yet. Here’s some simple
things dogs say
to us in
dog language to
ask us not
to give them
too much attention.
1. When your rescue
dog yawns loudly, it’s
saying…
What you
can do: Discreetly
observe your dog to work
out what it’s
trying to tell
you.
2. When
your rescue dog turns its
head away from
you and holds
the pose, it’s saying…
What you
can do: If
you want your
new dog to
trust you, respect its
wishes to be
left alone for
a while.
3. When
your rescue dog
lies down with
its chin flat
on the ground
and looks up
at you, it’s saying…
What you
can say back: Yawn
sleepily and ignore
it. This means, “Well
done.” Don’t worry –
your dog
isn’t sad, depressed or
sulking. It’s just showing
very polite manners
by exaggerating how willing and submissive it’s
being for you.
4. When
your rescue dog
is panting heavily, yet
it hasn’t done
heavy exercise, it’s saying…
What you
can say back: Move away and
give your dog
some space and stop looking
at it.
Often
dogs pant very
heavily when you
invade their personal
space by grabbing
them around the
neck and placing
your face near
theirs. This is very
confrontational to a dog.
You’ll see a
lot of dogs
panting heavily in
photos and during videos. Not
only is someone
usually wrapping an
arm around them, the
camera lens is
also trained on
them intently for
minutes at a
time which dogs
find quite confrontational. Some people
mistake a dog
that’s heavily panting
as smiling, but that
smile is actually
a grimace. It’s your
dog’s way of
trying to be
as submissive as
possible.
If
you see your
dog heavily panting
or grimacing, just move
away and give
it some space
and stop staring
at it. It will
wet its lips
and start to
relax. Maybe it’ll shake
some of that
stress off. Shaking the
stress off is the moment
when your dog
really starts relaxing.
5. When your rescue
dog keeps shutting
its eyes to
block you out, it’s
saying…
What you
can say back: Again, if
you want your
new dog to
trust you, listen to
what it’s asking. Leave
it alone and
stop staring at it.
The kindest thing
you can do
is just ignore
it for awhile.
6. When
your rescue dog
races around, barking manically, it’s shouting
at the top
of it’s voice…
What you can
say back: “Sure,
let’s tire you
out by exercising
all that pent
up stress out
of you.” Remember – a tired
dog is a
well-behaved dog – so go
grab a leash
and take it
for a long, tiring
walk.
If
your dog is
feeling extremely stressed – put it
on a long leash and
let it go
for a swim. Dogs
find swimming very
tiring in a good
way!
7. When
your rescue dog
comes and stands
patiently in front
of you, wagging its
tail slowly and
looking up at
you with pleading
eyes, it’s begging you…
What you
can say
back: “Yes,
you can
always come to me for
help.” Check out
the situation. Does the
dog need to
go outside to the
toilet? Have some water? Is
there another dog
nearby annoying it? Or a
child acting in
a way that
worries it? Always help
a dog that
comes to you
for help because
this is a
great opportunity for
you to win
its trust! This will
also help stop
dog fights or children getting
nipped. It’s the fastest
way to get
dogs to trust
you.
Remember – dogs
love humans who
try to communicate
with them in
Dog Language!
How can you relax a
stressed rescue dog?
The
best way to
relax a stressed
rescue dog is
to give it
relaxed, sleepy calming signals. Turn
your head away, raise
your chin, yawn slowly
and close your
eyes in a
sleepy manner.
What do rescue
dogs think of
human hugs?
I
know this will
upset some people, but
dogs don’t see
human hugs as
gestures of affection.
In the Dog
World, hugs are wrestle
holds. It’s
a way of
proving who the
stronger and more
dominant dog is. In
a serious dog fight,
it’s a
way of holding
your opponent still
so you can
deliver a winning
bite.
We
humans are related
to the ape
group of animals
and because we
once carried our
young around, we see
hugs as signs
of love and
affection. Dogs will never
understand this way
of thinking. It’s simply
not in their
instincts. They may politely
endure your hugs – but
they’ll never enjoy
them as signs
of affection.
I
know some people
will completely disagree
with me but
please keep an
open mind about
hugging dogs. Watch dogs
being hugged in
future and look
for the ways
dogs ask you
to stop.
The different
ways dogs ask
us to stop
hugging them.
Dogs
do many things
to try and
escape from human
hugs. They “accidently” bump people hard under the
chin so they’ll be
released. They “excitedly” scratch
you to make
you move away
and drop your
arms. They can lean
all over you
to dominantly invade
your personal space
and win the
wrestle that way.
They
can energetically lick
your face to
push you away
with their tongue. Sometimes they
dart in and
lick you straight
on the lips
so you move
backwards in surprise
out of reach. They
can even pretend
to turn around
and nibble at the
base of
their tail as
a way of
cleverly ducking out
from under your
arms.
If
your dog gently
licks your arm
trapping it, then it’s a polite
plea for you
to stop.
Some
dogs just stay
still, hoping you’ll soon get bored
and stop hugging
them. They reveal their
stress by panting
heavily. Have a look
at dogs in
photos being hugged. Many
are heavily panting. This
isn’t a happy
smiling dog – it’s a
stressed dog politely
asking to be
released from the
person’s wrestle hold.
Even
if you just
lay one arm
around your dog’s
shoulders, it’s a half wrestle hold. Dogs
still don’t see
this as a
sign of affection. They just
see it as
you testing them
before locking them
in a full
wrestle hold.
Pulling
a dog’s face
to your mouth
for a kiss
is dragging that
dog’s muzzle to
your own. It’s an extremely confrontational thing
to do. Kissing is
also confrontational. It’s like a dog
mouthing another dog in warning, touching the
spot where he’ll
bite it next.
Remember, I
didn’t make these
ideas up. I love human hugs and
being hugged myself – but
I do feel
I have to
be honest about
what dogs are
trying to tell
us.
I
wish I hadn’t
seen so many
dogs being euthanized because
they’d protested at
being trapped in
a wrestle hold
by an over-affectionate human
who meant well.
If
you completely disagree
with this whole
idea, please try to
keep it in
a small corner
of your mind. I
think over time
you’ll start translating
dog language a
little differently than
how you are
now.
I
know it’s a very big
change to take
in. We’ve been brought
up with movies, TV
shows, books and TV
ads where we
keep seeing people
hug dogs.
Watch
dogs “hug” other
dogs. It’s a way
of testing each
other’s strengths and
energy. Sometimes it erupts
into a play
fight, or even a
more serious fight.
Even
when you see
two dogs “hugging”
in their sleep, it’s
a way of
one dog gently
dominating the other
in a non-confrontational way.
When
you hug a
rescue dog, you’re forcing
it into a
wrestle hold against
its will. Your dog
will find it
extremely confronting and
stressful. It will keep
thinking you’re trying
to dominate it
by holding it
in a gentle
wrestle hold for
a few moments. This
will not build
trust between the
two of you.
Pushy
dogs, especially hyperactive teenagers, will eagerly
agree to a
wrestle with you
if you hug
them – but prepare to
get hurt because
they play hard to win! They
have the added
advantage of sharp
teeth and claws. As
they see it, your
hugs are a
clear invitation that
you want to
play rough wrestling
and play-fighting games
with them!
Even
if you don’t
agree with this
idea about dogs
disliking hugs, please never
allow a child
to hug a
rescue dog. Many children
are bitten or attacked
every year when
they hug a dog.
Dogs really
don’t want a young child
or a teenage
human holding them
in a wrestle
hold for minutes
at a time. It’s an incredibly
disrespectful thing in
the Dog World
to do and
an older dog
will discipline a
younger dog (or
human pup) for
trying it.
If
your dog does
allow a child
to hug it, this
is a very
patient, passive, polite dog.
Please start watching
for the clear
dog signals as
it politely asks
you to remove
the child.
This
might be heavy
panting, grimacing that looks
like a smile, slumping on
its side showing
how submissive it’s
being. Turning its head
away. Gently licking the
child to ask
to be left
alone. Gently hitting the ground with a wagging
tail to show
how confused it is.
What’s a great
way to show
my rescue dog
affection?
Dogs
love it when
you just hang
around together. They love
lying near you
when you’re relaxing. They love
following you around
and watching what
you’re up to. You
don’t have to
touch your dog
all the time
to show it
affection!
If
you want to
touch it – call it
calmly over to
you and stroke
it around the
top of its
head, neck and shoulders. Don’t stare
at it. Sleepily close
your eyes as
you stroke or
rub it calmly.
Ask
pushy dogs to sit
– and stay sitting – while you
touch them. Raise your
chin high as
soon as a
dog gets pushy. Sleepily close
your eyes to
relax them and
breathe deeply.
If your
dog’s leaning on
you, then it’s winning
points for invading
your space, so don’t
let it!
The main things
to remember when
you pat a dog:
Don’t
pat or rub
a dog under
the chin or
on the chest
as these two
places are extremely
submissive places for
you to touch. They
win lots of
points for every
pat they can
get in these
areas – and that’s precisely
why they love
being patted like
this so much!
Also, don’t
let your dog
“accidently” move its
head around to
try and trick
you into patting
it under the
chin or on
the chest!
Dogs are ingenious at
getting you to
pat them under
the chin and on the
chest. Touching these places
makes dogs feel
very pushy and
challenging!
What if my rescue dog
needs extra love
after being abused
or neglected?
I
know some people
will be concerned
that an abused
dog needs extra
love if it’s
to heal. However, in the
Dog World, all that
gooey human love
stuff is just
seen as weakness.
Trust
me when I
say the kindest
thing you can
do for even
the most abused, shy, anxiety-ridden dog
is to be a calm, capable
leader. Frightened dogs want you
to be in
control because then
they can relax
and shrug off
all the responsibilities of
being the leader
of your pack.
They
want to see
you calm and
relaxed because that
means they’re safe, so
use lots of
yawning and deep, sleepy
breathing. Best of all, even
the shyest, most frightened
dog wants to
see you happy
and having fun! It
may just watch
for a while
from a distance, but
it will help
it heal.
Fun
is a very
infectious thing in
the Dog World…but
let your abused
dog come to
slowly trust you. When
it’s ready it
will come and
tell you so
with a nudge
or a sniff. This
is when it’s
ready to start
making friends slowly
with you. This may
take a while. It
certainly won’t happen
within 24 hours!
Now you know
the basics of
how dogs think
and communicate...it’s time
to go pick
up your new
rescue dog.
Continue reading about the first 24 hours with your new rescue dog in Part 2 here!
Buy now as an e-book from Amazon here!
“What’s Your Dog Telling You?” is an absolute must for all dog owners. If you have a sensitive, shy, or anxious dog it’s essential! It was a bestseller in its first year. It covers so much – dog language signals, behavior problem solutions and how dogs think in different situations.
Buy now as an e-book at Amazon here!
My other book, “What’s Your Dog Teaching You?” is a fascinating book too. This shares 60 life lessons of how dogs can teach humans to lead a happier, more inspiring life. I believe dogs are some of the most influential teachers we’ll ever have in our life. They’ve certainly transformed my life completely. What’s your dog trying to teach you?
Many people tell me they buy my books as great gifts for other dog lovers. You may also like to share these free sheets with other friends who have dogs. I believe in sharing free information around as much as possible!
Pre-order now as a paperback from Amazon here!
Now I'm really excited - my memoir about my time living with a pack of street dogs in Garryowen, Ireland as a boy is being published in New York. The book's called, 'The Boy Who Talked To Dogs,' (SkyHorse). This is the story of how I really started translating what dogs are saying - a great book - I'm very proud of it!
Extract from Amazon:
When Martin McKenna was growing up in Garryowen, Ireland, in the 1970s,
he felt the whole world knew him as just “that stupid boy.” Badly
misunderstood by his family and teachers, Martin escaped from endless
bullying by running away from home and eventually adopting—or being
adopted by—six street dogs. Camping out in barns, escaping from farmers,
and learning to fend for himself by caring for his new friends, Martin
discovered a different kind of language, strict laws of behavior, and
strange customs that defined the world of dogs. More importantly, his
canine companions helped him understand the vital importance of family,
courage, and self-respect—and that he wasn’t stupid after all. Their
lessons helped Martin make a name for himself as the “Dog Man” in
Australia, where he now lives and dispenses his hard-earned wisdom to
dog owners who are sometimes baffled by what their four-legged friends
are trying to tell them.
An emotional and poignant story seasoned with plenty of Frank McCourt–style humor, The Boy Who Talked to Dogs is an inspiration to anyone who’s ever been told he or she won’t amount to anything. It’s also a unique, fascinating look into canine behavior. In these pages, Martin shows how modern life has conditioned dogs to act around humans, in some ways helpful, but in other ways unnatural to their true instincts, and how he has benefited enormously from learning to “talk dog.”
An emotional and poignant story seasoned with plenty of Frank McCourt–style humor, The Boy Who Talked to Dogs is an inspiration to anyone who’s ever been told he or she won’t amount to anything. It’s also a unique, fascinating look into canine behavior. In these pages, Martin shows how modern life has conditioned dogs to act around humans, in some ways helpful, but in other ways unnatural to their true instincts, and how he has benefited enormously from learning to “talk dog.”
You can also find Martin McKenna on
Facebook here!
Or you can find him on Youtube here!
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